Dusty Somethings rough draft

First of all, let me explain something. 

This is a rough draft for a Fine Arts poem that I am going to enter. Fine Arts is an event where hundreds of Assemblies of God youth groups get together to showcase their talents, like singing, dancing, acting, painting, writing, and so on. Last year I wrote a poem for it and got a good score, so this year I want to do it again. 

The poem I have is basically about the creation story in the most abstract, confusing imagery I could, while still telling the same thing.  I've already finished my rough draft, and I'd like all you people to read it and give me some  constructive critisism on how to improve it. 

Anyway, here it is:

Through the darkened space of nothing

Light engulfs unending voids

Alights upon a dusty something

And makes a greenish asteroid.

Condensed, the sky, in liquid thunder

Confined to lap against the land

To carry beasts that glide in water

And offer life to drying hands.

Then creatures rise to dwell in splendor

Brought to be by words alive

These noble souls reflect the wonder

That dusty things can be and thrive.

The Kind then stoops in unused soil

A place untouched by living light

And with His hands the King thus toils

Imbues a form with His own life.

A soul ignites withing this nothing

He joins the King upon His throne

And though he was a dusty something

The King has always loved him so.

Tell me what you think and how I might make it better!

~ Olivia :)

Sort of Sappy Poem (because why not?)

Amidst the grey and black from people
You're a ray of brilliant light
A color no one else can see
Except for those who are truly looking.

Everywhere you walk there is a color
Spilling out of all the grey
Making others just as radiant as you are
Just by letting your colors shine.

Please come walk and talk beside me
Let your colors mix with mine
I want to shine as bright as you do
For you're the only light I see.

~ Olivia

Free verse by dogs

Crunch, crunch, crunch,
Blue is chewing his bone
I almost told him to stop when I thought
Wait, Blue! You’re helping me write my free verse.
Keep chewing!

I then decided I knew exactly what to write
I’d write about my dogs,
The things my dogs are doing...
So Pablo is snoring, and Molly is barking,
Blue is crunching!

Yay! Thanks y’all helped me a lot!
And that is my free verse!

P.S. They were doing these things in real life.
-Ella Rose Briones 

.

The Clown Woods

I don't get scared like other people
I just don't jump away in fright.
Try and make me scream, I dare you
Let's go see who makes the night.

The woods fell still upon our entrance
Every footstep was a crack
I saw your face as white as sheets
A tension ready to snap.

The handler marked our tickets off
And lead us toward two doors
One for each of us to walk inside
To stand alone for the tour.

My heartbeat quickened as I walked
But I tell you, not from fear.
I wasn't scared at all from
Those creatures that were near.

BANG!

Like the sky condensed in thunder
Like the sound of a thousand drums
It blasted my body with vibrations
And made my nerves its victims.

I won't admit to anyone else
But I walked a little faster
Not because I was scared, mind you
But to save you from disaster.

I heard your shriek ahead of me
And quicker was my pace
Because I thought you were in trouble
And I was not afraid.

And then I saw him in the dark
A man as pale as death
With lips more red than cherries
And sour makeup on his breath

I heard a scream beyond the throat
That split in several places
And then the world became a blur
As I booked it past the exits.

Now, you might say that scream was mine
But, you don't have it straight
While people might think otherwise,
I was NOT afraid.

~ Olivia :D

I play too much Minecraft By Tobey

My Minecraft land has a big mossy tree fort,

it has a water park with two slides big and short.

I built a hidden maze inside a water fall,

i also have a party room where i have a ball,

Next to my mansion there is a cemetery down deep underground it is very scary.

I have a town thats snowy and cold,

and there's a pyramid on water made of diamond and gold.

The end of pain (I’m pretty sure this is a elgy poem)

                  The end of pain. by Trevor 

  

               In his finally day of pain

He was finally released of his dreadful bane

THE ODE OF PIZZA by Trevor

      THE ODE OF PIZZA by Trevor 

            

         I truly enjoy eating pizza

  It is well known that pizza completes a

         Soda with delicious toppings

        The thick golden melted cheese 

     That thaws in your mouth with ease

       A thing that is always served neat

         And I will always be ready to eat

I can always count on it being served hot and fast

         Too bad the It never seems to last

              Perhaps I am just too hungry 

Another Creepy And Depressing Poem: Venom

It's amazing how
Quickly you realize
Your time on earth
Is short
That moment when you see
That nothing is
Permanent
That everything can
Wither away
With one
Venomous
Bite.

Does all venom burn this way?
It's like fire in my
Blood
Like acid on my
Skin
Yet all this pain
Came from two small holes
That had been pierced
Into my
Veins
Don't feel bad
It wasn't your fault
This is a pain
You won't be able
To take away.

It's alright
There are worse ways
To go
I kind of find this
Exciting
Though you probably
Think differently
Don't cry
It's not that bad
The pain is already
Fading away
Stop saying that's a bad thing
It just means
My passing will be easier
I'd rather die
Without pain
Than live with this
Burning in my veins.

You only die once
That's very easy
But choosing how
You die
Is much harder
How you react
Is the last thing
Your friends will
Ever see
So I intend to make
My death count
After all
It's not every day
That a viper
Gives you this kind of
Attention.

~ Olivia :P

The PSAT

Please stay seated where you are.
You will receive instructions shortly.
Do not do anything without instruction.
Raise your pencils.
And begin.

The rush of papers flowing
Like an ocean
Of ink and parchment
Turning
Turning
Churning
My heartbeat
Throbs inside my eyes
Distorting the words
That swarm the wave of pages
Focus
Focus
You have to get this right
Which is the end
Of the beginning
Of the first
But I'm reading nonsense
Bubble this answer
Circle another
There's a wave of stress
And uncertainty
That foams from these words
On this small
Unimportant page
But it is important
Because everyone says
It's crucial to your progression
In life

Stop.
Put your pencils down.
Close your textbook.
Now you may stretch.
Stop stretching.
Return to the test.
We will begin section two now.
Pencils up.
Resume.

Oh, goodness
Numbers
Numbers and letters that
Are somehow supposed
To make sense
Does this make sense
To everyone else
Am I the only one who is lost
In this swirling
Churning sea
Of letters and numbers and testing
Focus
Focus
X times Y times something
Bubble this
Bubble that
Alpha
Beta
Is this even math
There are more letters
Than numbers
How is that supposed
To work
Panic is flooding
My veins
With electricity that is screaming
To move
The clock is ever
Ticking faster
And faster
Toward the end
But I'm not done yet
Just let me finish
I gotta get this right
If this is testing
I don't want
Any part
Of it
Help!

Time is up.
Pencils down.
The test is over.
You may turn in your textbooks and your test sheets.
And you may relax.

~ Olivia

Acrostic poem

Ray Charles is 

An amazing song writer. 

Yes, he was also a musician too. 

Can you believe he had twelve children?

Help!

And I would go insane!! He was a 

Really good person. He 

Loved his family very much. 

So, I like Ray Charles and I think he was very cool.

By Ella Rose Briones 

Poems by me

I am posting.

Poem by me/Abby Lunsford

No one

No one knows
How to find himself
Nor how to find me
My spirit is away from here
Right where it needs to be.
The shell that held my soul is gone
Underneath the sea
There is no one who can hurt me now
My life has left me.
Read this and remember me
After I am gone
After life has left my shell
And left me with
No one.


Infinity

                                            It is ever so peaceful here
                                                 Lying
                                                        in eternity
                                      Where darkness closes in on me
                                                              And surrounds
                                                       My infinity.
                                             My eyes are forever closed,
                                                             Blind
                                                               to the serenity
                                                                          Blinded
                                                               by my peacefulness
                                                                          Blinded
                                                          by the monstrosity
                                    Of the darkness coaxing me
                           Telling me I'm where I need to be
                                 Telling me I am not
                                    Blind.
                                    For how can I see the darkness
                                           As my eyes
                                                  are closed?


Haiku by me

1

Night is creeping through
the remnants of yesterday.
The sun is no more.

2

The simple brushes
Of the wind against the leaves
Fill me with quiet peace.

3

The infinitely
Dark expanse of universe
That is night has fallen.

4

This many haikus?
I want a reward now, please.
Give me ninety bucks.

5

Haiku can be fun,
But sometimes they don't make sense.
Hippopotamus.

The Best Days of Animal Friends

The leopards that rise

The cheetahs that run 

The cougars that hunt by surprise

The lions that have fun

The wild dogs that love to jump 

The foxes that cuddle 

The rabbits whose hop goes thump

The horses that tumble 

The cats that rest

These are the animals 

That are the best 

In the days that end. 

By Ella Rose Briones

A limerick by Asa (don't ask what it is I don't know.)

        PART 1

There once was a man named Mc Quirky.
He sat at his table quite perky.
He was expecting some ham.
But it was a sham.
And turned out to be beefjerky.

PART 2

He was somewhat surprised.

And as he rised.

He threw a brick.

Because of the trick.

At his plucked turkey's demise.

The Time Duet Part 2

Swift Time

Like a wild horse
Tearing at the earth with his
Hard, unfeeling hooves
In rapid succession
Time thus is.
Taking away life
Swiftly and quietly
With his groping, eager fingers
Time turns the hands of the clock
Faster and faster
Until night has already fallen
And your Time is up.
He steals your youth
As the years run swiftly by
And before you're ready
He is there.
Feeling no emotion
Time has only a sense of duty
To force the world
To make
Constant progression
Constant movement
Man moves to be remembered
To make a difference
Before their Time is up
But Time
Waits for no man.

My Haiku's

Sun shines on the house                                   

Two sit on a broken limb

The door flies open

 Shadowy Darkness,

To smoggy to read the page

To decalescent

From across the lake

Pass the cloudy dried-up limbs,

I hear gentle sounds

Soup (My Haiku)

the cool afternoon,

and aroma of our soup

fills my splendid nose

(This is about as creative as I can get~)

A Limerick

Beyond the far country of Mence
Was a boy who climbed over a fence
But once he got through
He was in for a stew
He forgot what he planned to do thence!

My Voices

My confusion is manifested
In twisting
Persuading
Enigmatic
Whispers
The voices of thoughts
Inside my mind
Telling me what to do
What to say
What to feel
But I don't feel
Because if I feel
Then the voices are
Right

Some are like ice
Crackling
They whisper dangerous thoughts
No emotions are
Permitted
In their hardened tongues
Others are silk ribbons
Weaving around my ears
Their whispers are soft
Gentle
Sweet as liquid chocolate
Yet what they say
Is bitter
The voices scream and rage
They compress my mind
Like boiling lava
Trapped in a volcano
With no point of exit
Always expanding
Contracting
With voices that aren't supposed
To be there

They tell me to move
To stop
To take
To scream
My body obeys
Because it's easier
That way
The voices persuade
With white hot
Iron
And cold white
Ice
That turn red with my
Voices' decisions
That have become
Mine

But I know they aren't supposed to be real
If all the voices were real
They would
Come out of my mouth
Speak with my voice
Become their own voice
Beyond the confines of my confusion
And wreak havoc
On the voiceless
World

The paradoxical bewilderment of my
Existence
Curls me into myself
Until I hear nothing
But the voices
Feel nothing but their
Touches
See nothing but their
Words
I'm an empty vessel
Filled with the unsubstantial
Voices of nothing
Who whisper desires
Motives
Drives
Into my empty
Bleeding
Mind

Some voices say I'm
Insane
But I'm not
Insane
Because that would make them
Insane
Too.

Raindrop

                                                                     A 

                                                                   Rain

                                                               Drop falls

                                                          And pierces the

                                                       Wind with destined

                                                     Precision and purpose

                                                  Too heavy for Sky to hold

                                                  In her silent invisible arms

                                                    So the drop falls faster

                                                       Shattering in pieces

                                                          On the dry earth

Random Haikus From My Collection

You can't make up words
Just to make five syllables
That's nimposterous.

A single snowflake
From the sky drifts slowly down
It lands, then it's gone.

Any kind of note
Can fill the ground with vibrations
If pressed hard enough.

What if you came and
Said what you felt about me?
I wouldn't stop you.

Use five syllables
And add seven syllables
Then five syllables.

If you were a rose
I would find you and pick you
Despite all your thorns.

Having four siblings,
A piece of silence is like
A soft, cool raindrop.

Heartbeat increases
Eyes dilate at the sight of
Him as he walks by.

A ladybug flies
Then folds its red wings and lands
Bending a plant stem.

The Time Duet: Part 1

Patient Time

Like a patient man
Watching the world die
From his land beyond space
Detached from the sentimental
Time thus is.
He draws all life
Into his rhythmic cycle
Of age and erosion
He calls to all of the earth
Living and dead
To churn into him
To come closer to him
And become lost to history.
He beats at the ground
One slow, powerful strike at a time
Gradually creating
A cavity in the earth
Called death.
Yet he waits so long
And calls so silently
That no one notices
How far they've drifted
Until they expire
And Time has claimed them
Once again.

Whenever I look at you.

I see your ocean eyes.
You always seem so blue.
I'm filled with butterflies.

Why so dark with your ocean eyes?
Longing to be what you're not.
Telling yourself so many lies. 
Your blessings all forgot.

We could be together forever.
I'll share with you my light.
Stay and leave me never.
We will be alright.

Ocean eyes
   -Amelia